Recently I have been thinking about growing up. I heard this really great song by Matt Papa called “I Wanna Be A Child Again,” and it totally transformed the way I think about growing up. I remember last year as I was making all sorts of scary decisions about college and financial aid and such, I would recite e.e. cummings’ famous quote, “It takes courage to become who you really are.” I wrote it all over my notebooks, posted it on my wall, etched it on my heart as a mantra, hoping that by saying these words that courage would come to me.
I blinked and the summer was gone, and I was in my dorm room as a college freshman. I had made it, or so I thought. For most of my life, college was “the goal.” When I was a kid, it was hard to believe I would ever get out of school, college was that light at the end of the tunnel. I had made it, I was an adult…
And then God started working in my life in ways I never expected through the ATW application process, through my jobs, through classes, etc. He was (and still is) calling me to be humble, to have faith as a small child, to depend on him. I laugh when I say that, because we as Christians all believe that humility, faith, and dependence on God are good things. The reality is, they are HARD things.
How do you become humble? Well, there’s not really a 5 step plan, it just sort of happens when your life starts going to pieces. It happens when you say, “I got this,” and then it just so happens you don’t. There are lots of tears and frustration because your pride is wounded.
It’s also hard to have faith and complete dependence on God. If you ask God for faith, he will put you in places that you will have NO other choice than to say, “The Lord is my refuge and strength, and ever present help in trouble. He will deliver me.” When there is no other way to look but up, your trust will be in God.
Who are you growing up to be? I want to grow up to be like Christ, even if that means that the road is hard, because He has promised to be with me.
Dear Seniors, if you are still wondering about where your life is going, just know God is with you. No matter how hard things get, He is there. It’s never the answer we want, it’s not easy, but it’s enough.